I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
I accidentally threw away from slim jim and some lady saw me dig it out of the garbage. It was unopened but still, I look so homeless.
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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