i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
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