bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
Blood and glitter go together right?
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
Randomize
