I puked a lego.
kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
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weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
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