chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
Thank you for not boning my boss.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
Had dinner with a married woman but didn't have sex with her. Tweeted at Mike Pence to apologize anyway.
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
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