I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
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