I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
This spray tan I used isn't working out. I spent an hour exfoliating and rubbing the damn stuff in with rubber gloves. I wanted the alluring, sun-kissed, sexy look. I've achieved smelling like burnt popcorn and the cats won't stop licking me. I'm a salt lick for cats.
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
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