YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
I just spit my fake tooth out at a customer. I think he thought it was my bubble gum though so it's ok.
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
Chasing shots with sriracha-covered mini toast was, in retrospect, not the best idea.
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
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