My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
I'm like, not good at living.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
Randomize
