I'm trashed wearing your mom's snuggie. She says hello.
I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize
