Quick, to the slutcave!
Life lesson: Don't give a drunk girl a dutch oven after having taco bell. She puked all over my pillow. Funny as hell though.
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
The power of my boobs compel you
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
is it fun? or sober?
Randomize
