2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
Randomize
