I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
this is a save-me-from-tijuana-tequila-and-hoookers booty call. if i don't hear from you by 8pm i'm grabbing my passport
if i'm not back tomorrow call the embassy
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
My liver has officially said "fuck this shit" and escaped from my body.
Randomize
