Please tell me you did not just serenade her with "Let's Get it On"?
Yeah I think it worked. My penis thanks you, Captain Morgan.
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
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