that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
Randomize
