i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
Aw.
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
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