he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
I know it's early but when you wake up can you please validate my life and tell me I'm not just a drunk idiot.
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
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