I love how you send me nude pics of girls you're fucking and name them by which city they're in instead of their name. "This is Nashville, this is Tupelo, this is Jackson..."
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
Some mornings I close deals. Other mornings I puke out my window while I’m driving down the highway
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
Randomize
