Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
you are never too drunk for berry picking
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
Randomize
