She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
The cop let us off with a warning because I had more Twitter followers than he did. The future is terrifying.
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
dude. I can hear the air.
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
Randomize
