Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
Randomize
