"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
Randomize
