Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
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