I must be too annoying 4 u.
im going to pretend im pregnant so i can eat a lot then i will accidentally fall down the stairs
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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