her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
I cut my penus on the lid.
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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