He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
I told my boss that I'm in a slutty stage of my life right now and the chef overheard and slipped me his number. I might get laid tonight
Fuckin' raining men in my bedroom while I'm trying to drunk eat a rather large portion of pasta. Like shoo I already picked who I'm sleeping with. Pasta wins.
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
Randomize
