So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
Randomize
