dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
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