In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
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