google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
Spent 30 minutes in the board meeting trying to figure out where the foul smell was coming from. Thought it was the guy's feet sitting next to me. Then i uncrossed my legs. Turns out it was my vagina. Thank goodness for travel size febreeeze.
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
Randomize
