Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
Randomize
