So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
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