Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
My chemistry professor just asked me if I ever found a ride home from the bar last Saturday
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
we're at the bar celebrating my ex bootycall getting his new gf pregnant... and me narrowly escaping a future as kitty foreman
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
Randomize
