it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
don't judge my taste in strippers
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
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