I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
Randomize