why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
I was being carried out of the bar, but then my friend saw Pat who just got kicked out scaling the wall to sneak back in, so he carried me back in, sat me on the bar stool, and the bartender just let us all keep drinking.
Being persistent has its perks my friend.
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
Randomize
