critical mistake not lubing the nipples
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
Randomize
