Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
Randomize
