is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
I'd love to come and give you a massage, but we already duck taped my keys to the ceiling...
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
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