we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
Randomize
