you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
I went out in a blaze of glory. I failed the field sobriety test by saying ABCD FUCK YOU.
I told her I had the flu when in reality I did way too many drugs last night, haven't slept and don't want to sit through a 3 hour buisness meeting trying to figure out which voices are real and which are in my head
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
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