so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
Mitt romney looks like a fantastic lover (full disclorsure: im 76% vodka right now)
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
So don't be alarmed when you go into your bathroom, he's sleeping in the tub with your brothers dinosaurs. also I'll clean up the sticky floor later. (you don't wanna know)
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
Randomize
