Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
Randomize
