you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
Randomize
