erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
you know you're not getting laid when you start breaking awkward silences with quotes from Robot Chicken
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Randomize
