Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
I feel like I could be a daytime drinking legend, like they could put that shit on my tombstone and right now your preventing me from reaching my full potential
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Randomize
