oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize