U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
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