He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
either we just had an earthquake or I am really good @ masturbating
im gay
i know
yea but for you.
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
I just cut open the plastic package of a Plan B pill using the bottle opener I carry in my purse. #whyidrink
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
Randomize
