"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
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